Mate. I mean maaaate, what are you doing?
I'm sure that's your kid playing on the playground right there and a good time he's having too. Also I think it sucks that society's knee jerk reaction is too often to regard dudes hanging around playgrounds as would-be paedos.
That much said. If you're going to hang out inside the fenced-off playground waiting for your kid and you don't want people to give you Side Eyes you should maybe consider doing the following:
1. Put on your shirt.
2. Stop doing planks.
3. If you must do shirtless planks on the grounds maybe at least turn around so you're facing the fucking playground.
Thankyou and good day.
Thursday, February 11, 2016
Thursday, February 4, 2016
"If you've noticed me driving in or out of work lately and you're concerned I'm maybe living out of my car and am not okay please don't worry about me: I've got some home opens going on right now and this is my attempt to get all the random clutter out of the apartment and... into my car. Honest. I swear."
Don't get me started on the day I realised my calorie count for Cadbury Creme Eggs was out by 30. Dark times.
This article over at The Atlantic on calories was an interesting read that nonetheless left me agreeing with this random reader's comment more than anything else:
Wednesday, January 27, 2016
I don't often link to Nick Lezard's frequently-excellent "Down and Out" column for the New Statesman, although I do read it, because pimping out the work of someone I consider a friend seems a bit gross somehow. Still, this week's installment is worth a link if only so you too can enjoy hearing someone described as "a meat-based conduit between the screen on his desk and the customer".
Tuesday, January 26, 2016
Monday, January 25, 2016
Friday, January 22, 2016
This anonymous column over at The Guardian, Asymmetric Love, is kind of fascinating. It should probably be printed out to keep for emergencies if you're the kind of person who thinks you deserve closure, which is really just a way of saying you're still super into someone and you wish they were still super into you.
Thursday, January 21, 2016
1. Hmm I must have put it somewhere else. I'll have a look for it later.
2. Strange, it's not here either... or here. But it must be...
3. ... somewhere, right? RIGHT? I MEAN IT HAS TO BE SOMEWHERE.
4. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up. It'll turn up.
5. I WILL NEVER RUN AGAIN.