Movies I have watched today that made me cry and cry and cry some more.

1. Atonement. Fuck. James McEvoy - only you could make me care about a movie with Pouty McPoutface as your love interest. (Also, I don't think I'm being blinded by lust but he does seem like quite a lovely chap, no?)

Things I Did Today:

1. Removed some tiles from the kitchen of the house I am attempting to renovate.
2. Fell through the hole in the floorboards of said kitchen.
3. Wrenched my shoulder.
4. Cut my leg in several nasty places.
5. Scraped my soft, innocent bottom.
6. Bled on my shoes.
7. Bled on the floor.
8. Destroyed a pair of Leona Edmiston stockings.
9. Humiliated myself in front of the property surveyor who witnessed several of the above acts.

"There was a desert wind blowing that night. It was one of those hot dry Santa Anas that come down through the mountain passes and curl your hair and make your nerves jump and your skin itch. On nights like that every booze party ends in a fight. Meek little wives feel the edge of the carving knife and study their husbands' necks. Anything can happen. You can even get a full glass of beer at a cocktail lounge." (Raymond Chandler, "The Red Wind")

Perspective

Reader, today has been a shitty day in a shitty week. A big story I have been working on for weeks has fallen over. I have too much to do and not enough time to do it. It looks like I may be out of the State for my birthday, and not for fun times but work-related travel.

Then two things happened. 

The first thing that happened was that someone I was dealing with was helpful. It's actually that simple. You wouldn't believe how many unhelpful dickheads I have to deal with on a regular basis, sometimes because they're, well, dickheads, sometimes because they're just normal people with busy lives. But I called someone up to ask them for a favour and they not only said yes but were sweet about it and made a bad situation easier.

The second thing that happened was that a friend of mine sent me a photo of a homeless guy curled up on a bench in the CBD wearing really really shitty shoes that were so old and worn through which you could see his feet through the soles. Like A LOT of his feet: he was practically barefoot. My friend took the photo because someone had bought a new pair of shoes (the tissue paper was still stuffed in the toes of the shoes) and put them beside the homeless guy for him to find when he wakes up. It's not a life changer. A pair of shoes isn't going to get the guy off the streets. They're not going to solve his problems, except for that problem he has with his current pair of shitty shoes. The shoes weren't even that amazing - they looked like  pair of inexpensive Dunlop Volleys or something pretty basic. 

But it was a sweet, kind, generous gesture that will hopefully make that guy's day a little bit easier. He might wake up a bit happier not just because he has a new pair of shoes but because he's had a little reminder that there are nice people in the world who will help others just for funsies. It also make me feel like, well, kind of a dick for whining about being sooooo busy with this job that pays my bills and sooooo frustrated at having to take an interstate trip to stay in a nice hotel. Quite possibly I've become a goddamn softie in my old age. No that's not a tear in my eye I've been cutting onions. Many onions.

Baby, no.

You may or may not have seen this story today about a toddler found dead in the back of a car a day care centre. Clearly it's way too early to say what happened to the kid. But it reminded of this amazing Washington Post article I read years ago and have thought about often since. It is a Pullitzer Prize winning article and maaaan does it feel like it. This is a story that stays with you and one you should read if you feel like feeling sad for a bit.

It's been...

... awhile since I posted a link to Sam de Brito's work but his latest column, which touches on issues of depression and how we treat depressed people, is good reading.

Fact: I want this otter in my arms yesterday.

Okay so some of these animal "facts" are more, um, facty than others. Nevertheless, this list has cheered up my bleak Friday so why don't you just click on the link and let it cheer up yours too?

Because who does not...

... love ze French kitty, non?

Yes. Yes.

A million times yes.

8 reasons to love Coco Chanel

1. “Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman.”

2. “A girl should be two things: who and what she wants.”

3. “I don't care what you think about me. I don't think about you at all.”

4. “My life didn't please me, so I created my life.”

5. “Elegance is refusal.”

6. “You can be gorgeous at thirty, charmimg at forty, and irresistible for the rest of your life.”

7. “Some people think luxury is the opposite of poverty. It is not. It is the opposite of vulgarity.”

8. Just look at her: she's a fox.

I see...

... nothing to disagree with here.

End of the Line

$0

That is the balance on my credit card. $0. That probably doesn't seem like a big deal to anyone else but, given I've spent the past eight months paying it off, it means a lot to me.

I've never been a huge one for running up credit card bills but late last year, for various boring reasons, I had to use my card to cover a big transaction that got my card up to about $8K - a terrifying amount to me given I'd never had more than a few thousand bucks on it at a time and then only in unusual circumstances.

That it has taken 8 months to pay it off is probably an indictment on my spending habits. But it's also a fact of life that will, I hope, stop me from ever getting tempted to run up those kind of debts again. Because, as chuffed as I feel with myself for clearing it, I'm not so chuffed that I ever want to go through 8 months of penny-pinching again. Poverty blows.

Happy Friday

If I Could Tell You

Time will say nothing but I told you so
Time only knows the price we have to pay;
If I could tell you I would let you know.

If we should weep when clowns put on their show,
If we should stumble when musicians play,
Time will say nothing but I told you so.

There are no fortunes to be sold, although,
Because I love you more than I can say,
If I could tell you I would let you know.

The winds must come from somewhere when they blow,
There must be reason why the leaves decay;
Time will say nothing but I told you so.

Perhaps the roses really want to grow,
The vision seriously intends to stay;
If I could tell you I would let you know.

Suppose the lions all get up and go,
And the brooks and soldiers run away;
Will Time say nothing but I told you so?
If I could tell you I would let you know.

(WH Auden)

In David we trust

I don't often link to the Daily Fail without prefacing said link with a hate-filled rant but this article on David Attenborough, in which he suggests it's irresponsible to have big families and other interesting stuff, is worth reading if only to hear him use the phrase "swanning about" in the last paragraph.

Flames... on the side of my...

This article on the making of the wonderful, very silly movie Clue is long but worth reading if you are a saddo fan like me.

Bowls of fuck, served by friends

I think it was Gore Vidal who said "every time a friend succeeds I die a little". But Vidal, despite writing one of the great coming-of-age novels didn't know what he was talking about because I am, it must be said, tickled pink that my dear friend Lindsay has made her Vagenda debut with this witty and insightful gem.

Things that make me happy

That not one but two of my lovely friends invited me over to watch this Sunday's premiere of The (Australian) Bachelor. Them's good people.

Elementary

Life is a confusing, bewildering and often terrifying place. At least it is for me. So it is immensely comforting to realise, from time to time, that somewhere out there in a vast and hostile universe is another someone who thinks just as you do and loves the same things you do... in this case, that person is the gem who green-lit this absolutely marvelously fucking excellent idea.

Signs I may be a little too obsessed by my cat, Mr Whiskerley.

1. His name includes an honorific and I'm not as embarrassed about that as I should be.
2. I fall asleep with him beside me most nights and wake with him beside me most mornings.
3. I have (genuinely) put off getting out of bed because Mr W has just settled into a new (cute) position leaning against me and I don't want to... hurt his feelings.
4. I have given him nicknames, including “Whickers” and “Whickerley Woo”.
5. I imagine I can read his micro-expressions.
6. I ascribe to him complex emotions when what his “frowny face” probably means is “I am hungry” or “you are sitting in my chair, you bitch”.
7. I think of the armchair as “Mr Whiskerley’s chair”.
8. I may have more photos of him on my phone than I do of my husband (I’m too embarrassed to count).
9. I am writing this blog.