Wednesday, October 29, 2014

I want to be alone

I don’t want to make it sound like I’m walking around the street getting catcalled all the time and, oh God, it's just such a pain being so beautiful and desirable because… no.

But like most young(ish) and nice(ish) looking women I have been on the receiving end of unsought attention from random dudes on the street plenty of times.

Sometimes it’s not bad, even ego-boosting, if it’s done in a polite and respectful way and I’m in a good mood. Sometimes it’s gross and offensive and scary. Sometimes it’s done in a polite and respectful way but it feels like The Worst because I’m in a funk or it’s the third time today or I’m just not in the mood to do the little dance so many of us women do, where we smile politely and brush it off without offending anyone too much. Sometimes I smile politely because the guy seems nice and/or harmless and I don’t want to hurt his feelings. Sometimes I smile politely because I’m scared if I don’t he might get angry and hurt me. Hey, my smile says, Please Don’t Murder or Rape Me.

Anyone who thinks I’m being a bit histrionic should check out this video, where a cute New York woman filmed herself walking around the city for a day (in jeans and a tshirt) and got 108 shout-outs from dudes on the street. One hundred and freaking eight. Can you imagine how TIRING it is to face that kind of constant barrage? Can you imagine how FURIOUS she would have felt after 10 hours? Can you imagine how much she would have wanted to just curl up in a dark room somewhere and Not Be Looked At for a few hours?

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