Quotable Quotes

(From Scrubs. Dr Cox has just snubbed J.D by naming him co-chief resident, rather than chief resident, as expected):

J.D: (clearly distressed): "I just have three questions - Why do you hate me when I show you nothing but love? Who's going to tell my mother? And what am I going to do with ten thousand "John Dorian, Chief Resident" business cards??"