Tuesday, September 4, 2007

Why do we want people to like us?

No really. I mean I suppose it should be obvious but... why? I don't mean why do we want our friends or objects of lust to like us (that should be pretty self explanatory) but what about strangers or semi-strangers?

This is on my mind because of a certain semi stranger I will call Hot Barista. Hot Barista works at my local cafe. Hot Barista is not my type at all but he is blonde, surfy and conventionally good looking. He also makes excellent coffee. I have only recently developed a mocha addiction but such is my personality that this addiction has spiralled out of control quite badly in the past couple of months, to the point where I probably head to said cafe about five days a week, almost always when Hot Barista is working there.

He and I have developed very limited reparte which allows us to acknowledge that we recognise each other and be pleasant without having to make much in the way of conversation. And by much I mean any. And yet, bizarely, although I don't fancy him or have any desire to get to know him I find I have started to consider what I'm wearing when I go into the cafe. I also check to see who is behind the counter as soon as I walk in the door. I make an extra effort to be nice and charming to Hot Barista when receiving my coffee and I'm not-so-secretly happy when he's particularly nice back to me.

But... why do I bother? Is it just a sad desire to be liked by people I don't particularly know or like myself just to prove how likeable I am? Or is it a product of evolution that drives me to stay on everybody's good side to increase my opportunities to stay alive and pass on my genes? I don't know but if it leads to some kind of mocha-related discount I'll be happy.

UPDATE: As of this morning I am moving into wanker territory where I can officially order ‘the usual’. Plus I think I got a 50 cent discount - hey, it’s something.

UPDATE THE SECOND: Yes thankyou certain people who know-who-they-are for the suggestion but I honestly don't have a crush on Hot Barista - I just want him to like me.

5 comments:

Dave said...

I suggest stalking... that always seems to work and stalkers seem to have the same problem - they just wan everyone to like them...

my name is kate said...

Was that you in the bushes outside my bedroom last night Johnsy?

Dave said...

I'm not going to dignify that question with an answer.

my name is kate said...

Your lips say 'no' but your eyes say 'yes it was and I didn't appreciate the mace in the eye'

Bolton said...

Hey we have a couple of copy boys here who totally aren't as hot as they seem at 11.30pm when you haven't seen your boyfriend for four days... but I'm kind of desperate for them to like me in the same sort of way. It's odd territory you're in here. Common, but odd.